by: Mary Seaquist

^{Clinic Director & Therapist, LMFT}

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"Love is not the icing on the cake of life. It is a basic primary need, like oxygen or water."

-Dr. Susan Johnson

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Love is essential to human connection. But did you know that people express and receive love in different ways? That’s where the concept of Love Languages comes in.

Developed by Dr. Gary Chapman, the idea of Love Languages helps couples (and even families and friends) strengthen their relationships by learning how their partner feels most loved.

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‍Have you heard of Love Languages?

Love languages are how people in a relationship give and receive love. When you know and show your partner’s love language you can “speak” to them in more intentional and meaningful ways!

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What are the 5 Love Languages?

1. Acts of Service
2. Receiving Gifts
3. Physical Touch
4. Quality Time
5. Words of Affirmation

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Ideas for showing your love

Important: Choose something your partner would like, not what you would like. 

If you don’t know, ask them!

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1. Acts of Service. Actions speak louder than words. People with this love language feel loved when others help ease their responsibilities.

• Do household or yard chores

• Cook their favorite meal

• Take care of the kids so they can rest

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2. Physical Touch. For some, touch is the strongest expression of love.

• Hug, kiss, cuddle

• Offer a back rub or massage

• Be physically close during quality moments

• Show affection through sexual intimacy

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3. Quality Time. Undivided attention means everything.

• Go for a walk together

• Plan a date night

• Play a game or do an activity you both enjoy

• Put the phone away and be fully present

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4. Words of Affirmation. Loving words carry deep meaning.

• Express appreciation verbally

• Send sweet text messages

• Write love notes or letters

• Give genuine compliments

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5. Receiving Gifts. It’s not about materialism, it’s about thoughtfulness.

• Surprise them with a meaningful present

• Create a handmade gift

• Bring home a small token that shows you were thinking of them

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Why Love Languages Matter

Learning and practicing each other’s love language helps:

• Build stronger emotional connection

• Improve communication in relationships

• Reduce misunderstandings

• Make your partner feel truly valued and seen

Remember, the key is to focus on what your partner needs—not what you prefer.

Love is most powerful when given in the way your partner best receives it.

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Find out your loved one’s love language and make it fun finding ways to show your love!

To find out one another’s top love languages, talk about it and/or take a love language quiz.

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For more information:

https://www.verywellmind.com/can-the-five-love-languages-help-your-relationship-4783538

https://5lovelanguages.com/

https://www.oprahdaily.com/life/relationships-love/a28084004/five-love-languages-summary/

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